week one

I finally have enough resolve to take a true look at myself and see that I am not happy with my appearance to do something about it.

Today was week one of waking up before work to begin my road back to fitness and health.  It is hard talking about weight loss for obvious reasons, and I have been in denial for long enough so here it goes. 

After I had Caleb I was super fit and in great shape, but as soon as I stopped nursing 2.5 years ago, the weight has been creeping up slowly and I've been ignoring it to a point.  I thought to myself that I looked fine, I should stop being so self critical.

I didn't like the way I felt about myself because I knew what my potential was.  So, just talking to a friend of mine has finally motivated me enough to kick it into high gear.  I have tried getting up early before to no avail, and have done a half ass attempt at working out after work for about a year without being consistent resulting in yo-yo weight loss and gain. 

I would think to myself that this is just the way I am going to look like now and I should accept it.  Well that all changed last Friday at work when I was asking my friend how she does it, I mean get up at 4:45 AM to exercise?!  I asked her what her motivation is and she said these simple but powerful words to me, "I want to exercise".  Hearing these words said so plainly hit me like my toddler running full force and jumping on my  stomach.  It took my breath away for a moment.  

"Because I want to exercise." 

Those simple words changed the way that I look at myself and my situation of working full time and being a mama and wife.  I want to feel better and look strong and healthy.  In order to do that I have to make the effort and I am so glad that I have begun.