Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Just Another Manic Momday: Welcome....Heir to Blair!

I just read this post and was compelled to re-blog this because it struck a chord with me.  It is EXACTLY how I feel, except during my lunch hour, I am attached to my breast pump, not getting errands done like I wish I could.

Just Another Manic Momday: Welcome....Heir to Blair!:
When my son was 13 weeks old, I slipped back into a black pencil skirt & three-inch stilletos to take my place in the coporate world once more.   Every day for the next year, I tearfully kissed my little boy goodbye & bitterly plowed through paperwork & client calls.   I hated being a working mother.  I was wracked with jealousy over my stay-at-home-mom friends when they held playdates & lunches.  I struggled with finding balance between work, marriage, motherhood, home, & myself.  News articles hounded home that the children of working mothers were fatter, sicker, & worse off than children of mothers who stayed home.  & it didn't matter if Charlie Sheen himself wrote the study, I believed that I was failing my child by working.
Slowly, that cloud of despair has lifted as my postpartum depression healed & my little family settled into a comfortable routine.  I met a few fellow working momma friends that helped me feel less alone as we shared tips for managing it all.  & you know what?  I realized that it doesn't suck.  Sure, being a working momma is HARD.  You're "on" 24/7, not only meeting the demands of a family & toddler tyrant, but also the demands of clients, bosses, products, & everything in between.  But it definitely has it's perks.
Reasons Being A Working Mom is the Hot Jam

  • The paycheck.  Money pretty much rocks & whether you're using it to put a roof over your head (like me) or buy pretty things from Anthropologie (occasionally me), it's a good feeling to see the bank account swell & know that I earned some of the cash that keeps us full.
  • Lunch breaks that don't include peanut butter & jelly unless I'm lazy & pack that for myself.  They also don't include being pelted in the face with mushy banana.  I can sit down with a good friend in a restaurant or eat quietly at my desk.  Sometimes in the fall & spring when the weather's nice, I take a walk around my office or eat outside in the sunshine while reading a book.  It's a rare moment that I get to myself.
  • Running errands by myself. Lunch isn't all bon-bons, though.  Most of the time, I'm running errands - grocery shopping, dry cleaning, buying dog food & diapers.  It's the only time I can get my teeth cleaned or my hair cut or my lady-bits examined, so I'm that gal laying on the exam table, eating a taco while the gynecologist...you know what? I'm not even going to go there. But I do get to do the mundane things in life by myself without hauling a screaming toddler in & out of a carseat, which makes them easier & faster.
  • The look on his face when I pick him up at the end of the day. I open the front door & he's there, running towards me with a big smile on his face.  He cannot wait to see me & it's reassurance that I'm still his favorite person.
  • Cute clothes. Okay, I'm actually torn on this one because some days I could really do without the tights & three-inch heels.  But when I'm at home, I tend to slave away in jeans & crummy tshirts.  Working ensures that I'm put-together with curled hair & make-up...at least 75% of the time.
  • Adult conversation. Granted, chatting about budgets with a coworker that has horrible breath isn't necessarily my idea of a good time, but sometimes I think it beats listening to Wonder Pets on repeat.
  • Living for the weekends. By the time Saturday & Sunday roll around, our entire little family is haggard & in need of rest.  But it's also a time to celebrate being together, so we cook a hot breakfast every morning & spend as much time in the sunshine as possible, after being cooped up in offices.  Nate & I trade off getting time alone - both to ourselves & time alone with Harrison.
  • Things are 100% equal on the parenting front. Like all parents, we're both equally exhausted.  But since we both log 40+ hours in the office, neither can point fingers at who worked harder.  That means that chores, parenting, & responsibilities are split 50/50.   I have just as much time to cook & clean as he does, so when we're almost falling over dead on Friday night, we're both folding size 18 month onesies & pants.
Like I said, it doesn't suck all the time.  There's some bummer parts about being a working momma, but honestly?  I'm not going to go into those.  There's enough negativity out there about those of us with mommas that hold down a nine to five.  We know the benefits of staying home, but it's time to recognize that working can also benefit the family.  At the end of the day, I may prefer to be with my son & dream of a day full of playdough & Little People & yes, even tantrums.  But when I'm sitting in my quiet office at 8am on Monday morning while quietly sipping fresh coffee & checking email, I smile.  Because that moment certainly doesn't suck.

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thanks for the nice comment :-)